Who Stole The Kishka?

So, Kishka is a type of Polish sausage. In fact, "Who stole the kishka?" is a line from Brave Combo's "Polkatharsis" album. To set the record straight-- I love polish sausage and polish music, but I hate their dots.

polka dot
n.
1. One of a number of dots or round spots forming a pattern, as on cloth.
2. A pattern or fabric with such dots.
polka dot. (n.d.). The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition. Retrieved May 28, 2008, from Dictionary.com website: http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/polka dot

One must note that there is a distinct difference between a dot and a spot. A dot is a perfect circle. Spots are a more generic shape. Although their edges are curved, they often are oblong potato shapes. A dot, therefore, is a subset of a spot. However, when referring to a spot, it is usually not completely round or the term dot or circle would have been used instead.

Although not the most reliable of sources, an excerpt on wikipedia explains a little more in depth on the polka dots I dislike:

"Polka dot patterns are quite variable: they range from a series of dots that are equally spaced and sized to a random arrangement of multicoloured dots of different sizes. Polka dots are most commonly seen on children's clothing, toys, and furniture, but they appear in a wide array of contexts. The pattern rarely appears in formal contexts, however, and is generally confined to more playful attire such as bathing suits. Occasionally white on black regularly spaced polka dots appear on more formal clothing."

I've ordered these in decending order of my own preferance. I find it humorous that most polka dots are associated with clowns and odd animals.

Now, there are some really cute polka dot things. It seems that polka dots are allowable on completely absurd and silly objects, but there are some really hideous things out there too that people think are normal. Do these girls really get up in the morning, look in the mirror and think, "Man I look good!"?

Although these shoes aren't my personal favorite, I can understand why someone might like them.

It's probably the engineer in me that can only handle a certain amount of entropy in any given system. I'm perfectly ok with dots that are all the same shape and size. Varying the dot's diameter makes a person seem asymmetrical and lopsided. The dots should be distributed in a normal linear repeating pattern. I shouldn't have to calculate the limit of the summation of some countably-infinite geometic series of dots in order to determine why the dots appear as they are. I prefer the colors to be uniform throughout the pattern. Swirling greens and purples on a yellow background make me feel as if I've been on the merry-go-round a bit too long.